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We are still full from our burgers in paradise, so this evening’s meal will be another healthy choice – happy hour drinks with snack food. Let’s see, we have cheese and crackers, chips and salsa, left over pizza, yep that should do it. We do have steak and pork loin (no, vegans we are not) potatoes and peppers and other cool stuff from the Marina Market in the fridge, but we both agree that we will graze tonight. We are tired and still too full to get motivated to cook in or eat out. I find it an interesting observation that while we are on St John we seem to either eat very, very well, or take up residency in the junk food jungle. There does not seem to be a middle ground here with us. I take solace in the questionable fact that salsa has veggies in it and cheese is a wholesome milk product. The crackers have some sort of whole grain in them, I am sure! In fact, our grazing is quite healthful. And of course the rum….well, everyone knows about the medicinal value of rum; and then there is all that fruit in the rum mix… I am feeling healthier by the minute. We’ll be full of energy in the morning!

It is now Monday, Yeah, Sunday took awhile. Once again we are drinking coffee and looking out over Coral Bay. It is quiet right now, but in a few hours the ever popular and highly raucous Labor Day Parade will begin. In the meantime we are looking over the Reef Madness guest book entries. This might seem to the casual observer a simple thing to do, but to us, it is like reading your high school report card. We studied, really we did. We turned in all our projects, but some of them were not turned in on time. I hope there weren’t any nuns with rulers staying here. Well of course there were no nuns staying here (not yet, anyway), but what if something went horribly wrong and some good people spent a lot of time and money and had a not so good time? What if they hated RM? What if they fell off the Seagrape cliff or were bitten by a donkey or something? What if they found a scorpion in their bed (don’t laugh, that happened to us…no not at RM, but here on island…and at a nice villa too…). What if Buster or some other scary person, had words with our beloved guests? Oh the pressure… I can’t read these guest book entries. After our second cup of java, sanity returned to us and an epiphany broke through. It is very hard to have a bad time on St John regardless of the good, bad, or indifferent villa amenities. Yes, it can happen, but it as a rule, no. The Caribbean Sea is still that amazing turquoise blue; so warm and soothing. The sand is still white, the fish and the turtles abound, and St John’s vistas are still breathtaking. The villa is just the wrapping. The true prize lies beneath. OK, a week of solid rain can put a damper on things. We were here a week in November of 2003 when they set a record for rainfall in a week. No power on the island either. We still had a great time. Hell it’s only water… OK a lot of water, but still, we swam and snorkeled, let the rain be damned! We have even run afoul of one or two of the more colorful locals and have learned that mostly they are like the barky island dog subjects; more tail wag than fang flash. Just leave your fingers inside the car windows… so to speak. For some reason, quirky people seem to fit in here. And yes, sometimes all the multiple and complex cultures collide on these islands. Most Anglos born and raised on St John, St Croix, and St Thomas admit they do not wholly understand the West Indian culture, but they seek to learn and accept what they do not understand. If you don’t, St John can never truly be home. St John is where the inmates run the asylum and I look forward to earning my stripes. ‘Nuff said. OK, the guest book, lets take a peek…

I am reading “The Book” and am happy to report that the Reef Madness reviews have been glowing! All sorts of comments have been made that have us blushing (ahhhh shucks, you are turning our heads). One family in particular touched our hearts.

Apparently the week before their family vacation to St John and Reef Madness last July, the family patriarch learned he had inoperable cancer. When he asked the doctor about the wisdom of going on this long-planned trip to the islands, the doctor said, “Go. Absolutely go.” Somehow this amazing family put aside their shock and came together on St John. They mentioned in “The Book” that this was the best family vacation they have ever had. They enjoyed all the beaches and beauty that St John has to offer, but the best times, the most precious times they said, were the hours they spent together at the villa, at Reef Madness. They were able to embrace each other and this special moment in time and share their love and laughter. It sounds as if they had an abundance of both. Their message is a time honored one but still resonates in truth. Enjoy the now. Smell the roses. When a time comes that you can’t, you can withdraw the fond memories saved up in the “enjoy the now account” and remember… and smile. I have always believed that St John is a magical place, a place of healing. If the body can not be healed, the soul can. We have experienced it first hand more than once; that is one of the reasons this island calls to us. We wish all the best to John and his family as he continues his battle…

Another budding writer and artist is young Abby. This young lady (ten years old) wrote most eloquently in the book and created some mighty fine drawings illustrating her family’s experiences on St John. Thank you Abby! It was interesting to note that all of those who wrote universally showed a taste for adventure and an eye for Mother Nature’s artistry. They also all seemed to know how to have a rip-roarin’ good time. Several comments noted how they enjoyed listening to the stories of the people who live and work on St John, the when and whys of their journey to this place. There were also some humorous remarks in “The Book” about their experiences with the local absurdities that proliferate in this open air asylum. Each and every entry touched us and made us smile. I am at this minute making a deposit in my “now account” for future fond memories. Thank you all for sharing your experiences with us.

No, we did not fall off the face of the earth. Yes, we have more stuff to chat about. Somehow we turned around, it became November and we haven’t finished September’s trip. How do these things happen?

Wow, I just saw our first green iguana on Seagrape, strolling down our porch. Don’t know who was more startled, him or me. How cool is this!

Jerry the pool guy is here. No wait, that doesn’t look like Jerry. Jerry’s a girl pool guy, I mean pool girl and her name isn’t Jerry, its Alice. She apologized for our murky, florescent green pool water and said she was at fault (not Jerry) and would do better (yeah, I heard that before). I hope she tries harder because I want to get into my pool and I am afraid that I might come out looking like I have been irradiated! And what about our guests…! Anyway, a second chance is deserved by all, but no third strike. We are in control of so little down here, but a clean pool is a must and we do have some say on that(...maybe...I hope).

Our favorite “Spice Girl” (St John Spice that is), Ruth will be joining us today. She has been promising us a visit for ages but has always slipped our net. Today we lured her in by using sneaky, sinister tactics. We dangled a beach trip to Maho in front of her and she snapped up the bait. That Ruth and husband Ron are suckers for a Maho beach day. Wait, everyone is a sucker for a Maho Beach day! So we will get some medicinal rum into us (I have heard it has mighty fine mosquito repellant properties as well as the ability to stave off scurvy) and maybe a sandwich or some sort of sustenance then head off to the beach. Oh-oh, we might miss the world famous St John Labor Day Parade! Oh-NO!!!! Wait, we will not miss the Labor Day Parade, but if we blink, we might. There are young girls marching in pretty green uniforms down below, followed by young at heart girls marching in line, and…now…it’s over. Yep, three minutes, that’s about right. OK, the parade is short and not well attended, but the party down on the field goes on and on and a great party it is too. It will go on until dark at which time all the other Coral Bay Labor Day Parties start to kick in. I have to say, Coral Bay does know how to party hardy. Poor R&R; they come all the way out to the “country” only to get stuck in a Coral Bay, Labor Day traffic jam. They probably had to wait in traffic for at least four minutes! After such a traumatizing traffic jam, well, a little blender action is in order. Good old Rumsfeld, our hero. Ron and Ruth have brought with them sandwiches from the Deli Grotto so after a medicinal rum-blender drink, we dive into some really great sandwiches and then off to Maho. Today it is a bit hot and humid – a perfect beach day and we’re in luck, there is plenty of parking at Maho. The day is very, very warm, the water is very, very warm and we stayed in the water for a very, very, long time. We stayed and stayed and stayed…because the minute we left the water, a hoard of blood thirsty mosquitoes surrounded us smacking their blood thirsty mosquito lips. Those little guys even followed us out into the water, quite a ways out, in fact. Have I mentioned that there have been a lot of tropical disturbances around the VI’s? We have tropical depressions to the north, south, east and west of us (is this some sort of a record?) and the island is a beautiful verdant green because of all the rainfall. We have happy plants and we have happy mosquitoes…about a bazillion of them. So hour after hour, we stayed in the water, waiting for a sign that it was safe to leave, turning white and wrinkled like tossed out tissue paper. At last we make a break for it. We race to shore, grab our towels and flee towards the cars - the lunch crowd snapping at our heels. To them, we are walking (or running), warm bodied delicatessens. We open the car door and the air force invades our sanctuary. I have never departed Maho in such a hurry as I just did. Barely had time to say goodbye to Ron and Ruth. They understood; brothers in armed mosquitoes they were. It is interesting to note, that with all the mosquitoes flying about, we did not get one mosquito bite. Nary a nibble. Maybe there is something to this rum repellant stuff!

So off we go, Ron and Ruth to their Cruz Bay abode, and we back to the sleepy side of the island. Did I say sleepy? Au contraire, mon amie. That parade was just the beginning of this grand Coral Bay party. We got back to Reef Madness about 5PM and music was in the air everywhere. We sat on the porch and had happy hour listening to some great tunes coming from who knows where. Good news! Our baby puke green pool water has magically changed back into its crystal clear Caribbean blue former self. The evil spell that was cast upon it was vanquished by the sorceress Alice. The pool is calling us, so with poolside bar service, we take the plunge (not that we needed to sit in water any longer but we couldn’t resist the song of the pool Siren.) What a joy it is to hear the raucous sounds of musically gifted Coral Bay, sipping on a frozen mango rum drink, looking out over the edge of the pool, Caribbean blue on Caribbean blue, on to eternity.

Ok, let’s pretend that it is Tuesday, the day after Labor Day. Come on, stay with me here. I know it has been a long haul, but here’s some more faintly amusing musings. Sometimes it is hard to write about the warm breezes and cool sounds of St John when you are stuck in Maryland and you drive to and from work in the cold and dark. But continue I must. Sometimes I can daydream most of the afternoon away thinking back on it all. Here goes my productivity…

It is morning and we are out on the porch sipping “special coffee” and gazing off at the vista surrounding us. Gone are the revelry makers, the music makers, the dancers, the food vendors and the politicians shaking hands, making promises, seeking votes. The Labor Day gala is at an end with only one lone man walking the ball field picking up littered remnants from the night before. Actually the lone man has a great deal of company as all the sheep who were banished from the ball field the day before have returned to reclaim their grazing rights. Back too are the voices of the Guy Benjamin School children, their days of freedom now irrevocably at an end. A very vocal donkey is braying somewhere below us, perhaps voicing his displeasure at a power trimmer savagely hacking away at a potential donkey meal. There has been a break in Reef Madness guests and the Bananaquits have not had their regular flow of their coveted sugar that they have grown accustomed to. On our last trip to the island, we were filling up the sugar feeder three times a day. The sugar birds have yet to empty the container we filled on Sunday. Will we be able to lure the old gang back or have they migrated off to parts unknown for more consistent care? The true blue (or yellow and black) Seagrape Hill, RM regulars are still showing up and still are entertaining us. The break in the Reef Madness guest schedule is the longest since we started renting. I don’t get it. Are people really that intimidated by one or two measly hurricanes lurking about? The lull in tourism is of course island, indeed Caribbean, wide and since it happens predictably every year, it does give villa owners and property management companies a chance to get at those maintenance issues and sprucing up tasks that would be disruptive to a villa guest. It also gives the tourist and service industry folks some time to get a little RnR of their own. So today is a Tuesday, a work day, for the rest of the country, but not so much here. I am amazed at how quiet things are. Missing are the chugging dinghies motoring the boat residents from home to their land transportation that gets them to their day jobs. Where is everyone? Well, Lewis for one is in Michigan visiting his daughter. Many others are up north in Massachusetts; Massachusetts seems to be the state with the largest contingent of ex-pats in Coral Bay, perhaps even in all of St John. So where is everybody? Why they are here, in Maryland, in Maine, in Virginia, and Alaska. They are all taking a nostalgic trip home, where ever what they used to call home is. So I wonder why most of those people are New Englanders? Coral Bay is a little Red Sox Nation down here…and the Patriots…rabid fans abound. Why did they all leave? Oh yeah, I suppose all that snow and such might have influenced their decision. Perhaps it had something to do with driving to and from work in the cold and dark.

Tuesday Part II
It is raining now. Soon the Bananaquits will be drinking syrupy water instead of munching on granulated sugar. They do look silly when they look at you with their long hooked beaks covered in sugar. They remind me of the commercials where the milk drinker ends up with a “moooostache” above their upper lip. This might not be a beach day. Oh well. I predict a nap in my future. The phone rings and it is our friend Steve (of Steve and Vicki) returning our call. It just happens that today is Steve’s birthday (29 again, right?) and maybe we can all get together and celebrate. Celebrate on St John? That never happens. We shall touch base later and firm up plans.

OK, we closed our eyes, just for a little while and get our “power nap” We need to keep our strength up for the arduous remainder of the day. What’s that I see? The sun is valiantly trying to pierce the clouds. I must be prescient. I see a dip in the pool in our near future. So of course as soon as we get into the pool, the phone rings. Technology is a wonderful thing. The cordless phone works even through solid stone and concrete walls. The plans are in place, we will meet up with Steve and Vicki, et al, at Aqua Bistro at 5PM. Thank goodness for that. I thought we might have to eat in a third night in a row, our social lives in disrepute. We would be the uncoolest of uncool! People would start changing their phone numbers just to avoid our pleading calls. “Please, someone, anyone, lets go out for a bite of supper, a glass of beer, a bowl of peanuts…anything. Just be our friends…” Have I mentioned that everyone has left the island? Well, not everyone. Our nearest and dearest are still here, thank the gods. Oops, there’s the phone again. It’s Josephine. We love Josephine, but when one talks to her, one had better get comfy because her chats are seldom short; always entertaining, but short…noooo. Like everyone else she has been off island as well. She just got back from a very quick five day visit up in our neck of the woods (Maryland). Her son just started at the US Naval Academy in Annapolis (just spitting distance from our very own Shady Side) and her daughter is enrolled at St Mary’s College, just a bit further down the road from us. With two kids in college, no wonder Josephine is ramping up the landscaping around Reef Madness (and all over the island). She will have to grow a lot more organic greens to sell to restaurants because college kids can suck you dry in no time. Lucky for us, our kids have four legs and fur or we would have to bid farewell to St John and Josephine! Maybe her kids are smarter (but maybe not… ours are brilliant donchano), but my kids are cheaper. They never ask to borrow the car and they chase away the squirrels from the bird feeders. Do her kids do that. I think not!

Tuesday, Part III
Wow, how did it get o be 4 o’clock? When is happy hour? Oh, yeah, happy hour will be with the birthday boy and Vicki. I guess Rumsfeld will have the night off. Good thing, he’s been working way too hard of late. There is just enough time to jump into the shower and wash away today’s hard toil (villa gravity weight) and sniff out a clean t-shirt. Let me see, what to wear, what to wear. Well, I have my working T-shirts; I have my everyday T-shirts; I have my special occasion T-shirts. Yep, this is a special occasion! I will wear a specialty tee (after all this is a grand birthday celebration). My dress tee (the one with the turtle with a cutlass and patch over one eye) and shorts without the mustard stain should do very nicely. So off we go to Aqua Bistro.

Driving down the Seagrape slope, we notice some old friends lurching along. Larry and Curly, our Seagrape Donkeys! One of the them, (Curly?) sticks his head inside the widow and wants to shoot the breeze for a while. Wait, where is Moe? Oh dear; I seem to recall reading about a car/donkey accident in Coral Bay a few weeks ago. The outcome was tragic. The described victim seemed suspiciously close to our beloved Moe. I do not know for sure if he was a casualty, after all, why would he ever want to leave serene Seagrape Hill for the hustle bustle of big city Coral Bay’s hazardous streets? I prefer to believe that Moe has grown up and left home. Perhaps he is away to college (rumor has it that he was accepted into the animal husbandry program at St Mary’s College), or taken a job on St Croix? Perhaps he became smitten with a fair haired maiden donkey and is setting up housekeeping on Honeymoon Beach. Wherever he is, we miss him and hope he is happy and contentedly eating someone else’s mango tree. May the gods be with you Moe, wherever you are. We bid goodbye to Larry and Curly who are uncharacteristically closed donkey mouthed about Moe and we head on down the road.

We arrive at Aqua Bistro after an exhausting two minute drive. The place is fairly busy for “slow season”. We meet up with Steve and Vicki along with their friends Joan and John. After several rum concoctions we all get into a political discussion (always a very wise thing to do after drinking several rum concoctions). I can’t remember who was on what side of the political fence. I, for one, seemed to agree with everyone as everyone seemed to make so much sense (there is this total clarity of universal philosophical truths when one has had four or five pain killers). And then there was this crusty old lady (old being at least three or four years my senior) sitting unaccompanied at an adjacent table who was known to several people at our table. She is a published author having written several books and she moved on over to our politically active table. She brought even livelier political proselytizing. I do not remember her name, any book title that she scribed, or even what her particular stand on any issue was. In fact, much of the evening is a blur. I do remember the evening being outrageous, raunchy, contentious and ultimately silly. Just another pirate’s night in old Coral Bay… Happy Birthday Steve! ARRGGGGHH!

Wednesday Morning
This morning we got up and were greeted by a buffeting breeze the likes of which we seldom get at Reef Madness. Reef Madness is protected from much of the island winds as she sits nestled in the hillside just slightly below the crest of the hilltop. It is as if Seagrape Hill has her protective arms about RM and takes the brunt of the breeze across her shoulders. This should be helpful (hopefully) if a hurricane shows up. It is very squally. There are white caps in Coral Bay and I wonder about the comfort of the boat residents below. I suppose living on a boat one should be somewhat resistant to motion sickness. Good thing I don’t live on a boat. I can get sea sick snorkeling or watching home movies. I have the soul of a sailor, the equilibrium of a gyroscope and the stomach of a geyser. I would love to sail the seven seas but must live vicariously through the tales of those who have. There is a misty rain blowing sideways, wetting pen and paper and I am driven inside. This too is unusual as we have a fiercely protective covered porch providing shelter. The coffee is not quite ready yet and after last night’s celebration, my body cries out for its soothing bite. I suppose I am as addicted to coffee’s charms as my friends the Bananaquits are to their sugar. We are the Reef Madness brotherhood of substance abusers. Here in the quiet of a St John morning we hold our anonymous meetings together. Ah, I hear the coffee pot beeping, “I am ready now; come to me”, it says.

There are so many tropical disturbances going on in the Atlantic and Caribbean right now that the Weather Service doesn’t even mention them all. The one passing over us right now was not noted until it was on top of us. The sheep down on the ball field are huddling together for some protection rather than sprawling out in their normal higgledy-piggledy formation all across the field. We don’t just keep close tabs on the weather down here, but look at the reports affecting our home on the Chesapeake Bay as well. Several years ago, Hurricane Isabel caused a great deal of damage along the low lying wetlands that make up the Shady Side Peninsula. The Annapolis, Maryland business district, just a few miles north of us, had local business people making their way to their shops in row boats. We had the National Guard boating their way to our front door to make sure we and our Shady Side neighbors were all right. Homes were lost; people displaced. We never thought such flooding could happen to us. It did. Our naivety gone, we are much wiser and more anxious these days. The hurricane threat here on St John is a very different animal than that which can show up on the Chesapeake. Here, they have killer waves, killer wind and a third world infrastructure. A storm track that leads a tropical depression up the Chesapeake on its eastern side will do no harm. The same storm traveling the western side of the Chesapeake pushes water up the Bay, flooding all the low lying areas in its path. Nobody in Shady Side has ever died from a storm surge. However, a once fortunate waterfront dweller can become an unfortunate shelter dweller by winds that aren’t even close to that which slam into Caribbean islands every year. Yep, next to coffee, the Weather Channel and National Weather Service online are becoming my obsessions. Have I mentioned that there is a tropical depression, expected to become a hurricane, expected to travel up the eastern seaboard? We have come here to relax and I can not. I hear rum is a good anti-anxiety medication. “Rumsfeld…are you up yet?” Ok, maybe later, after my coffee.

Wednesday Part II
I think the word has gotten out. The Bananaquits are suddenly back in full force. They must have some great kind of networking system going on because all at once they are lined up at the feeding trough. Time to fill up their feeder.

Joan and John, whom we met last night at Aqua Bistro, just came by to look over Reef Madness. Joan is just finishing up her own house overlooking Johnson Bay. Oddly enough, she is one of those people who doesn’t “get” St John. Was this before or after she started to build on St John? Perhaps it was the building process that did her in. That happens a lot. One of the many worries we had during the building process was: will our love of St John come back? Right now, we dread going to our island; we do not enjoy the beauty, the beaches, the smells and sounds of St John like we once did. Will the magic return? If so, when? Well the magic is back; St John still is just as astounding as it ever was. But, Joan has put her lovely, nearly completed house on the market. Perhaps with the slow real estate market, she will have time to rethink this decision. Perhaps enough time will pass that the open wounds infected by the construction process will scar over and she can enjoy the fruits of her temporary insanity… er…I mean, her villa. Building a home in Nebraska or Connecticut is trying. Multiply it by a hundred fold and you will just begin to imagine the challenges facing a would be villa owner building here in the islands. So after their quick tour of Reef Madness, off they went and off we went.

We have important stuff to do in the big city of Cruz Bay. First stop, Scotia Bank to perform some mighty important Seagrape Hill Landowner Association business. Have I mentioned that we are the president and treasurer of this mighty fine association? Yes, we are very, very important people here in these parts. Dogs and donkeys bow before us. Of course after all this very, very important banking business, we will have worked up a thirst and appetite. It will be time for lunch and a trip to the Beach Bar. Of course any stop at the Beach Bar requires a stop at St John Spice to visit spice girls Ruth and Vicki and of course Mr. Spice, Ron. Have I mentioned what a sweetheart Ruth is? When we went into St John Spice, Ruth was standing there with a devious grin on her face. “Come up here”, she said as we followed her up the wooden stairs leading to a dark, cramped storage area, “I have something to show you!” She pawed through some boxes until she found her secret stash. Sometime ago, Ruth asked us if we had any pictures of Reef Madness that we could send her. Of course we have hundreds, thousands, perhaps trillions of Reef Madness pictures (she’s our first born villa donchano) in various stages of life. We sent a more recent shot not giving it a thought. That was several months ago. Well, there inside this shipping box was an original artist’s rendering of Reef Madness in water color. She said she had it done by an artist friend living in Massachusetts based on the photo we gave her. She also had one done of Bongo Bongo and plans to have prints of each available for sale at St John Spice. We are such proud parents! Our RM in living color, how cool is that! Perhaps she will become famous and star in a major movie blockbuster. Johnny Depp will costar! Media offers for her will start pouring in. She will be world famous! Ahhhh, I can see it all now….

Turn about is fair play, right? So now we are going to go over and check out Joan’s new digs at Johnson’s Bay. I must say the view at Joan’s place is amazing. It is sad to see all the work that has gone into the place only for her to turn around and sell it. Oh well. The place is 90% finished and Joan has been comfortably staying here for the past few weeks. She has everything she needs to get by: there is bedroom furniture, living room and dining room furniture, a working kitchen and most importantly she has all the basics for fine happy hour and it is happy hour (it is always happy hour on St John). I love a well stocked villa, don’t you. Steve and Vicki joined us just in time and brought with them a young lady named Holly. So we are all sitting around sipping on our beverage of choice and chatting. Just what does this person, Holly, do on St John? Well, Holly has the world’s most stressful job. She is a professional house sitter. Yes, she goes to the finest villas all over the islands, and watches the house while the owners are away. She makes sure the plants are watered; the cistern stays full, that the blender keeps working and the pool is properly exercised. Who knew there would be a full time job living in other people’s houses? Yankee capitalism at its best!

After we drank our fill, it was time to head back to Seagrape Hill, but first, we take a detour down past Love City Market and look up Miss Green Thumb herself, Josephine. We had to tell her how great everything looks at Reef Madness and how happy all the birds and flower loving mammals, reptiles and insects are. Josephine in turn gives us a full report on how her kids are doing back in Maryland. Her son is attending the Naval Academy in Annapolis and her daughter, Mimi is attending St Mary’s College in St Mary’s City, Maryland. Mimi is at St Mary’s College because they have an exceptional sailing program and Mimi is an exceptional sailor. In fact, Mimi is the 2nd rated Laser Radial youth sailor in the country and mama Josephine is very proud.

We get back to RM and it is time to stoke up the grill. With thick cut pork loin chops that we picked up at the Marina Market and some roasted potatoes and grilled peppers, we have the first real dinner of our trip. Damn this tastes good. It will be an early night. We do not want to stay up for the 11 o’clock tropical storm update and spend the rest of the night fretting over the potential weather. It is time to get in the island state of mind which has eluded me thus far on this trip. I shut down my internet connection to the six or seven weather sites that I have been obsessing over, turn off the weather channel, and vow to hand my fate over to the weather gods. May they show mercy on us all.

Well I have finally let go of my hurricane fixation. I have squandered enough time on it. It was Steve who told me, “Why waste time worrying about something that might not happen. Look at the time you’ve already wasted”. He is right and I have stopped…for now.

Last night, it was so blustery that the little cup that holds the Bananaquits’ sugar blew clean off its moorings. I think it is somewhere down at Skinny’s. How I knew the cup was missing was that one or two of those yellow and black sugar junkies flew over to the railing right in front at me and stared me down. I swear they were stomping their little birdie feet on the railing to get my attention. “Hey, you, get off your ass and get us some grub over here!” Good thing we have several more of those little plastic bowls so the Bananaquits won’t go hungry. We just got them back to our feeder. I don’t want them getting their sugar fix somewhere else. I wonder if they are as entertained by our antics as we are of theirs. Perhaps the fine dining is only part of the equation and it’s the floor show we put on that brings them in.

Maintenance Pete just stopped by with his maintenance Pete list of to dos. One big thing that is on his list is the water leaking in the great room. When it rains, and it has been raining a lot, the water streaks down the stone wall, making it look dark and sinister. Island stone has a medieval quality to it in its own right. Pour water on it and I see chains bolted to the wall surrounded by implements of torture and cruelty; the sheriff of Nottingham plotting someone’s imminent demise and evil doers lurking in the shadows. OK, perhaps my imagination is a bit over the top… I am happythat the wall is stone however. What a mess it would be if it were sheet rock or wood. Do they even use sheet rock here? Pete has fixed the leak once; I saw him fix it and it was dry – for a while. It’s back. Kind of reminds me of the mildew…goes away, comes back, goes away, comes back, goes away… The good news is the mildew finally was beaten into submission. Now if only the leaks (pool leaks, water pipe leaks, drain leaks, wall leaks… all leaks) would just go away. Perhaps they will go away once we have put Pete’s kids through college.

We are heading out to the big city again, our destination: The Market Place, home of Carlson Construction. Josephine told us that David Carlson had done a waterfall treatment at some place where she landscapes and thought he might be a good resource to talk to regarding our waterfall. We gave up on the idea of having a fake concrete waterfall because…well the prototype we looked at looked like it was a fake waterfall. My idea of having a huge boulder placed by the pool and having water run off it was derailed because no one remembered to put a huge boulder in place until after the heavy equipment had left the Reef Madness job site and the outdoor tile had been laid. So now we have scaled things down a bit and are considering several largish stones, a size that strong men without hernias can move into place, to replace the single huge boulder. Rule number fourteen in the “things to remember when building on St John” list clearly states: never, ever, ever get your heart set on something being the way you have imagined it, no matter how much you explain it, draw it out, plan for it, set aside money for it, demand it, snivel and whine for it, because if you do, at best, you will be disappointed or even heart broken; it will cause you to lose sleep and be angry all the time. At the worst, it will drive you stark raving mad. Just ask us, we have a lot of experience in stark raving mad…

So we met with David Carlson and we immediately made a huge tactical error. He asked us how much we wanted to spend and we told him. Haven’t we learned anything! Never tell a contractor how much you want to spend because the cost will always be that amount…and more. We thought we were being quite realistic, even generous with the amount set aside for this little project. And of course, he will spend every dime of that money and probably more… if we want water to run down it. Anyway, he seems to “get” what we are looking for and even has a couple of places we can go look at which shows some of his work with natural stone waterfalls. Still, I have to keep reminding myself of rule number fourteen. He seems to get it, but does he?

Now we are off to Honeymoon Beach for some play time. It is a perfect day at Honeymoon. The place is deserted; no one is around. Try finding that in January! Even the mosquitoes are missing. Cool! While snorkeling, we saw two golden eels slinking in and out from between the coral and boulders, one somewhat large, shy one, and one smaller seemingly bored one. I always feel it has been a successful snorkel if I chance upon an eel. I don’t know why, but I do!

Thursday Part III
Tonight, we have been invited out to the finest restaurant on St John. Yes, tonight we will be dining at Chez Schurter (Steve and Vicki’s house) which is just above Joan’s place at Johnson’s Bay. I have had Vicki’s cooking before and she is one fine chef. So a quick dip in the pool, a quick shower, another sniffing out a clean Tee and shorts, hummm, getting a bit low on shorts that don’t need a haz-mat sticker, (hey, its only Steve and Vicki, right?) and off we go back to Johnson’s Bay.

Steve and Vicki’s house is amazing. Really, it is too cool for words – almost as cool as Reef Madness. Well I suppose actually it is as cool as Reef Madness as it is nearly its twin. The same architect designed and built both villas (well actually ours got handed off but basically the same people worked on both homes). I mentioned Joan’s view was amazing. Steve and Vicki have the same view only higher up. Did I mention that Vicki is one terrific cook? I have dined at Chez Schurter before and she knocked my socks off then and things smell pretty darn good right now. OMG, wonderful wine, filet mignon on the grill, risotto, salad, dinner rolls, and for dessert…home made New York style cheese cake with strawberries. I think I have died and gone to heaven . Move over Asolare; there’s a new gun in town…

Reef Madness...The Sequel